Absolute Acceptance

How would you answer the question: What is the opposite of fear?

For me, there are different answers on different days, depending on what I’m experiencing and where I’m at in my journey.

Sometimes the answer is Love.  Sometimes the answer is Courage.

Today, I feel that the opposite of fear is Absolute Acceptance.

Accept everything.  Accept what the moment brings to me.  Who said it should be any other way?  Why do we put so many expectations on life?  Life should be like this and it shouldn’t be like that.  He’s supposed to do this and she’s supposed to do that.  I’m not supposed to be like this, it’s not supposed to be this way…and so on and so on.

Have you ever taken a look at how many should’s and supposed to’s that you are projecting onto each and every moment?  The problem is that we are mostly doing it unconsciously.  But I invite you to bring it into your conscious awareness.  It may be painful, yet I still invite you to do it.  It’s when we finally see the truth of our habits that we have the opportunity to change.

Life is life.  But I put my expectations on it.  Then, when life doesn’t match my expectations, I suffer. Isn’t it so?

Let’s check our expectations carefully.  I believe that they are causing us pain.  But the good news is: Although we cannot change the current of life, we can change ourselves and our expectations of it.  We can change our perspective.  We can let go of our demands on life and just lean into it AS IT IS.

Is this easy to do?  No way!

But will it bring us more peace?  Yes, definitely.

I have heard some call this “radical acceptance”.  I want to call it “absolute acceptance.”  Absolutely accept every single thing as it is.  Look into your own heart and find the judgement, expectation and “should” that you put onto yourself, your situation, or the person involved in it.

Let’s stop demanding from life.  It’s stressing us out and disabling us from being ALIVE.

Let’s start in small doses – just a moment here or there when you can grab hold of this perspective.  Awaken the calmly observing eye within you that is watching life through you without any commentary of goods and bads, rights and wrongs.  I’m not saying to stay there always because that will lead to disappointment in yourself.  Instead, take it easy and slow… just try to begin the process of waking it up.  That eye is always open, but we couldn’t allow ourselves to see from it because we were so busy judging ourselves and our innocent lives.  And why?  With what and whose standards have we been judging with?

I believe this is an important thing to consider in our journey of awakening.


9 Thoughts.

  1. Fear is such an overwhelming emotion, so it’s hard to even imagine the absence of fear. Letting go of judgment is another huge challenge we face everyday. The expectations that I have for myself even override my expectations of life. Right I’m in a state of flux and transition right now, so I’m seeking more peace and serenity. To answer your initial question, the opposite of fear for me today would be calmness. Thanks for your thoughts on Absolute Acceptance…I’m keeping that in mind for my Monday Motivation!

  2. Danielle. Very wise and thoughtful words you have written about absolute acceptance. It is indeed a radical way to live. Such synchronicity here because I just finished a week silent retreat on the false self/true self/ego(of which fear is a dominate emotion.) . I think we must acknowledge, admit /name Fear when it comes and allow ourselves to feel it deeply. However we must not let it entrap us. Courage and bravery are the antidotes to fear. They are companions that can help us move through Fear. Helpful acronym we learned: The FACE of the false self: fear, attachment, control, entitlement. Broad acceptance is perhaps the opposite / enemy of these four qualities of the ego. What do you think?

    • Charlene, I think that the best analogy is that of a bomb or a gun. Those four qualities are like a fully loaded weapon, or a bomb ticking…absolute acceptance would be simply snipping the wire that de-activates the bomb, or unloading the bullets from the gun…the bomb and the gun remain but they are no longer dangerous weapons. So if you can truly absolutely accept then neither fear, attachment, control or entitlement….they cannot hurt you. You can observe them as part of the ego, but they no longer have any power. Does this analogy make sense? Does it answer your question?

    • This is very interesting. I love both of thee acronyms! They are exactly what we are working on in our Self-Mastery class.
      Perfect 🙂

  3. That’s a great analogy that I never would of thought of myself. Yes it answers my question. It makes things clearer and helped me better understand the dynamic, especially the part about remaining but having no power. Thanks so much…. Until our next class!

  4. One of my favorite inspirational quotes:

    “Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear. The brave may not live forever, but the cautious do not live at all”

    – Ambrose Redmoon.

    It actually is featured in a painting I did for my gallery wall in my bedroom. I found it to be fitting in regards to the topic of this post.

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